When you marry with a positive mindset, all issues are addressed in
love. Even if things get serious at a time, they are resolved with
apology from a sincere heart. The key is; marry in truth, not in deceit.
Actor Mofe Duncan and his beautiful wife, Jessica, in a chat with Punch, share their love story:
How did you meet your wife?Mofe:
I met my wife for the first time at a wedding I anchored in Lagos. She
was a member of the event planning team. She caught my eye and I was
distracted. I always tell her that she threatened my career with her
beauty, but God took control.
At what point did you realise that she would become your wife?Mofe:
I decided to spend the rest of my life with her when she came to visit
me from the United Kingdom. She visited me on the set of a movie and I
immediately saw the positivity of having her as a 'homemaker'. She would
pack me a bag that contained sandwiches, cold water, boxers and inner
shirts.
She did all those because within a short period, she realised that I sweat a lot because of the lights used on set.
What was the initial attraction?Jessica:
I loved the way he made me giggle and smile whenever we spoke. We spoke
like we had known each other all our lives and that was definitely the
initial attraction.
Mofe: I was attracted to her smile; it always soothed my day and still does.
Did any of your parents oppose your relationship?Jessica: We did face some form of opposition but we are now a happy family.
Mofe: I do not think that there’s any Nigerian couple that did not face opposition.
What do you love the most about your union?Jessica: It has been so amazing. I am so lucky to be a part of his life’s journey.
It feels different being married as I now have a lot of responsibilities but I’m enjoying every bit of it.
Mofe: I love the experience of being married to my wife.
It
took her a while to adapt to the Nigerian culture because she was
raised abroad but we worked together to make sure she was okay. The experience of being married to Jessica is the best decision I have ever made.
Did you nurse any fears while courting?Jessica: Yes, I did especially because he is an actor and he meets many women in the line of duty.
How often do you have disagreements?Mofe:
We rarely quarrel because she is my best friend. We talk all the time.
The moment I try to get upset is the minute I start to miss her. We
fight over who controls the television but I bought a second one, so I
can now play my PlayStation 4 without being disturbed.
Jessica: To be honest we only argue over the TV. Apart from that, we haven’t had many disagreements.
Who apologises first after an argument?Mofe:
My wife apologises first.
I’m too busy trying to break my last record of how long I am able to
stay pretending to be angry with her. My wife doesn’t have time for all
that because she dislikes confrontation.
Jessica:
I
apologise because I don’t like the awkward feeling of not speaking to
each other especially because it’s just the two of us living together. It just feels weird, so we talk for hours about what happened before we go to bed.
Do you sometimes invite a third party to broker peace?Mofe: No, we don’t. The only people we ever talk to about anything are our mothers. She talks to mine, while I speak to hers.
Most
times, we regret doing so because after a few days, we come to the
realisation that we could have sorted things out by ourselves. However, we still receive motherly advice.
What would you say accounts for the success of your union?Mofe:
Our faith in God, our friendship and the undeniable passion we have for each other.
Jessica: I think the fact that we communicate effectively with each other has helped us understand each other better.
We have a good understanding of each other, so it’s easy for us to communicate about anything.
How do you relate with your female fans?Mofe:
As a male actor, the female fans can best be described as your greatest
fans. This is because the male fans can’t be really bothered about you;
they won’t download your movies or put up your picture on their
Instagram accounts. As such, learning to relate with your female fans is
key. Sometimes the relationship or rapport with a female fan can be
misinterpreted. When this happens, you may get disrespected, but that is
one of the things that comes with being a public figure.
Do you sometimes regret being married to a celebrity?Jessica:
I don’t but it just means I have to make a little effort each day when
we are in public. I have to understand that he is at work and for a few
hours every day, I won’t get his full attention.
Why do you think some people cheat on their spouses?Mofe:
It can be attributed to stupidity, lack of control, and the drug called 'fame'.
What is the most memorable gift you have shared as a couple?Mofe:
I think it is spending quality time with each other. We do almost
everything together. Whenever she travels to the UK, we ensure that we
communicate regularly. We also ensure that we take advantage of any
opportunity we have to be together as a couple.
How do you react when female fans celebrate your husband?Jessica:
At first, it made me feel very jealous but now I guess as a male
celebrity, he will attract more females than males. What can I do? If
nobody celebrates him, I will have to ask myself what I have done that
has made him not worth celebrating.
Do you operate a joint bank account?Mofe:
Yes, we operate several joint accounts.
Do you sometimes disagree over finances?Mofe: This hardly ever happens because my wife is very understanding.
Jessica: Come on Mofe, who doesn’t?
I may want to go shopping while he wants to put money aside for more reasonable things.
What advice do you have for celebrity couples?Jessica: They must ensure they understand their spouse and communicate effectively with each other.
Most importantly, they must make sure they love each other genuinely.
Mofe:
They must learn to ‘love hard and love long’ because it pays. Above
all, it is very important for them to feel free to talk about everything
under the sun with each other.